Today I went to the local Phoenix library known as Burton Barr to get a book by Scott Oden called Memnon. General Memnon is a Greek mercenary who actually fights for King Darius of Persia. He is a general who Alexander met at his own home when Memnon was held captive by King Philip. Alexander was only seven years old at that time for it is the time that the Persian ambassadors and delegation came to obtain the release of Memnon and two others who were also being held captive. It is possible that Alexander then met Barsine who was Memnon's wife, as some historians maintain that most likely Alexander had met up with her when he was a child before he finally obtained her as a spoil of war. He later became enamored with her so that there is some dispute whether she was mistress or wife but she did bear him his first child. Incidentally, when I asked for proof that I had been Alexander in yesteryear, his child Heracles, or Hercules, is one of the visions that I recall vividly giving him some proof. Also I did see Barsine who was wearing a heavy shawl or veil over her head in the custom of the then Persian women. She was who I believe probably influenced Alexander most in his adoption of Persian attire which aroused so much annoyance with his army.
Oh my, I started to tell how I had to go from point a several miles by bus to get the rail to go many more miles to Burton Barr just to get this book which I have begun to read. I digress a lot at times.
In the process I nearly got myself killed...I had just written a post to my friend Joan telling how yesterday I had thought I was going to die...I was in a dream and found myself falling into a black abyss of some kind and I knew that if I fell I would die, so something nudged me back up to wake up and an inner voice told me, No, you are not going to die...you are going to be well and I forced myself up out of my sleep and to walk to Basha's to get some bread. The point is that as I felt as though I were going to die, I felt the freedom that accompanies death, free from all earthly matters, but I did not want to die...so I guess I made myself get up...then at the library I found this awful film called Black Swan which I have started but put on hold because of its psychodrama....wheee...I understood too well where this film is going now but am not quite ready for it.
However, all of that made me know that I must put my house in order. yet today when getting off the train, I was very bad girl. I actually ran out in front of the train. The engineer did not like it, blew his whistle, and then I ran out into oncoming cars and ran so fast as lightning which was all very exhilirating despite the near calamity of it all...I was truly crazy to do that I admit and I said to myself, bad girl, I am not suicidal at all...and I am not but I had not counted on cars coming so fast at me...a girl saw me and caught up with me who said she liked how I did that...I was fast as lightning when I saw those cars coming at me...I could have been hit...so afterward, I waited for all lights before crossing, my form of repentance for past sins...don't we always do that?
This Alexander thing has a real hold on me, doesn't it seem?
Oh, I laugh at myself all the time about my former lives...Right now, on that note, too, abovetopsecret is saying that the photos of bin Laden's corpse may be released soon. I wish that they would be. I would like to see them, gruesome or not.
Will close at this point...I have spent too much time on broadband.
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