Memories making sense to me

Yesterday was the ninth anniversary of my mother's death which I can recall as vividly now as when it happened.  Nothing can erase that memory from my mind. So last night, as I had trouble getting to sleep again I was once again in the twilight zone of between wakefulness and sleep.  For some reason, visions come to me at times like this, and all of a sudden, I was seeing Philip doing something that I had years ago written a brief scene about in my first draft attempt at writing about the life of Alexander.  I could see Philip from the eyes of a child, a youngster, as he looked so tall and so huge to me, even in my recollection last night...It then struck me that I had written this scene, and now here I am seeing it again.  Then it made me think of another time that I had seen him in a vision come to me.  Maybe it is all coincidence that it came on the early morning of the sixth, and that I have always associated Philip with my mother for some reason...Sometimes I associate him with my dad also.  It is a family thing...odd that my dad would end up blind in one eye this late in life.  I hope that my delving into the past had nothing to do with that because he did not have to listen to me but one time when I told him about Kleitos.

My dad and Philip seem alike in another scene that I wrote.  That one oddly enough was based upon some historical data that I had read.  But I could sure see the similarities between the two.  Which has always made me believe that life is like the ocean waves, or the seasons, simply repetitious, and nothing new under the sun but the same old stuff returning to life again and again. I am convinced of that for certain

But last night I became fixated on a vision of Philip holding Cleopatra in his arms.  I am standing beside and behind him watching this scene unfold.  It made me realize that some other scenes that have been playing in my mind about the boys who attended school with Alexander are a part of a memory scene.  I keep hearing and seeing these events so clearly but because of computer problems am letting only dwell in my head.   This is the first I have written them.