I have been discussing the story of Marie Adelaide, and am using Joseph Barry's article which was printed in Horizon magazine, Spring, 1967, as my source. I do not want to simply copy so much of it and I will return to it after I take a break and interject a few ideas that are popping into my head when reading it. Very briefly I will say that Marie Adelaide defended her husband despite his having been a failure at war when serving in the military. Another anecdote is told about the King when he foolishly had Marie Adelaide accompany him to Fontainebleau during a pregnancy. Because the king was insufferable and unbearable, she had a miscarriage, and Barry quotes the famous statement that the King had made at the time which offended all the listeners. He was quite thoughtless and careless in his remarks about his concern for the successor to the throne. After all, it is a worry as it had been for his own father so that the King bore this burden of who would succeed him rather openly as told in a familiar story that most authors love to tell. It exposes the king as a self centered and thoughtless, overbearing, and dominating man at times, and everyone was aghast at his saying his thoughts so outspokenly as he had.
I am considering this episode now. I have somewhat understood it as I saw it as a way for the king to unload, but he did so at the expense of Marie Adelaide and the Duc du Burgogne which was not kind or nice of him. While reading a story told at abovetopsecret just now in which some reaction mentions karma, I did think about this story upon rereading it again for the umpteenth time. Perhaps it does explain why in this lifetime I did not find a suitable mate for me to marry to bear children. Besides the fact that I may be infertile or simply just not attempting to have children as I should have had I been married, I remained childless. However, it dawned on me that perhaps some would think it justice for having had so many children when in the King's shoes, and also perhaps for this thoughtless statement...maybe in a way, some may think I am getting my just desserts. If so, believe me, being childless is a blessing, regardless of what people may think.
But again, I would sound similar to the king were I to speak up and say why. But at least it does give to me exactly what the king had said, and that is freedom from others criticizing me for the way I do or do not rear my children. It dawned on me while rereading this article that perhaps in this lifetime, I am a bit too much like what the king's favorite childhood story had been, and maybe I asked for it then and am having to live it out now. All kinds of things occur to me when reading about any of the lives of the past.
I also talk aloud to myself in my apartment at times, and I know that while I do not discuss these lives except to a rare few (at discussion groups) or for some freakish reason to friends to whom I felt compelled to tell them, I do talk about it aloud at times...I wonder if maybe like in Divine Comedy I could go through a kind of spiritual dwelling place and simply retrieve myself from where I had been locked into the spiritual vaults so that I could take myself out again and remember when...a lot like putting things into a safe deposit box and occasionally going through them to see why I chose to put them there instead of here in a box in the apartment.
At any rate, because I had written a piece here that was trying to be a disclaimer, I suffered my bleeding nose problem again (always putting me in memory of Louis XIV and Genghis Khan) I received some spiritual insights and decided to no longer question it, but to accept it as having been given to me in good faith and thus for me to accept it in good faith. It is not for me to question but to just know so for Heaven's sake, I have finally learned that.
I admit that in writing and rereading things again, I think about other things like karma and all that. As such, I do not believe in karma as some do, but I believe in nature's laws, and that we all simply go forward, and like snakes that crawl out of their skins to leave them behind, and go on, so it seems that that is exactly what the soul does with each lifetime and piece of flesh that it had worn before.
Now, a friend of mine has done something on her blog that I like, so I may try to use some of my photos from my trip to France to recall where I was almost a year ago now.
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