I have to explain that spontaneous moments when one is suddenly whisked back in time is different from using hypnotic tapes which take you back into a sleep state where you are immersed into a different time period.
I realize how this sounds to people who do not ever have the occasion to experience something like this except maybe to suddenly drift back into a memory of a childhood experience, a memory of a place and time in one's present past and realizes that it is as real as when it first happened.
Right now, I can slip back to when I worked at the Derry Drug Store and remember the layout of the store, the place where I worked, and some of my co workers there. It is easy to recall vivid scenes of the past, but one always realizes that one can only recall snatches.
I have had memories where I had induced myself into a sleeplike trance to wend my way back into a time that today's mind and mentality has no knowledge of whatsoever. This is why I am always amazed at this property of memory which must be within some other aspect of one's self than in the thing called brain. My present life has never experienced any of those places, any of the people involved, so how on earth is it possible to find one's self in another time, recalling vividly experiences there? I decided that it can only be the soul that has the memory function to do this, for my current brain does not know any of it except that it has now filtered into it through the act of going back into time and living it now in the present time period as it had been lived then.
There are such things as proofs and I am the one person who does most not want to be deceived in this exercise of learning who I had been, and what part of me had been that person anyway?
There is no sense in kidding around. I do not want to pay for anyone else's deeds then or now had I not done those myself. I know that Jesus supposedly pays for all our sins, and I frankly do not believe that either. I believe that perhaps in an allegorical way he may have paid off Adam's sins, but I do not believe that he paid for any of mine, and I would not want him to do that either. I want to be held responsible only for my own actions, good, bad or indifferent. So you see, I disagree with much of theological teaching about Jesus's life and death. I do not believe that men get a free pass just because Jesus lived, died, and resurrected himself from the dead.
I do believe, however, that the almighty creator which created all of us out of love for himself and his need of an expression of himself through us, loves each and everyone enough to keep us all in the palm of his hand and that faith alone makes me believe in a loving creator, not a punitive creator.
Life is a drama enacted upon the theatre and stage of the planet...we are all actors in this game of life, and we are all a part of it in many different ways and dimensions.
I went back in time through a spontaneous moment to the time of Tyre...I was standing beneath a huge fortress of a wall that protected the inner city. As Alexander, I had demanded the city fathers to let me in to pay respect to the gods there, but the city fathers denied me the right to enter. As I had already visited an oracle at Delphi, had solved the Gordian knot, I had come to believe that I am the ruler of the world, and that I must prove it by conquering everything that is in sight so that the world will become one...Each and every nation will be under my rule once I accomplish my goals...I am determined to spread the law and culture of Macedon/Greece to the world around me.
I have decided to pay my respects to the gods in this city, which is an island fortress, and I must control it at all costs so that I am victorious in achieving my goals, and Heaven help anyone who tries to prevent me from it. I set about entering the city through many means, but one way is to build a causeway from the mainland to the island...Wedged within the city are the citizens and the city fathers and men and women who decide to oppose me and my army from entering. I can hear their cries and outbursts as they try to build a defense to prevent me from getting into the city. Some did escape from the city to find safety elsewhere but many stayed to fight my forces. I had siege towers built to throw missiles across their walls, and they did fight back valiantly, throwing burning oil and sand down into my soldiers faces, and the burning sand caused many to jump into the sea to get relief. This only angered me further, and two of my siege towers were burned, but were quickly rebuilt. We fought long and hard, and I am furiously bellowing at my men to hurry and get those towers in place as we planned to penetrate the walls to enter the city, killing as many who were inside as they were trying to kill those of us on the outside.
We outlasted them, and finally found a place of weakness where we were able to finally penetrate the walls. This has taken us nearly seven months of toil, labor, and fierce fighting to accomplish. I have been actively cajoling, directing, and managing all the instruments that were used as well as encouraging and maintaining firm discipline in this long, tired effort. I will not give up, give in, or let anyone else slack in this effort. We are getting into this city, no matter what..It has been tried before, and lesser men gave up. A Macedonian led by Alexander will never give up, but will persist to the end, and so we did.
Cries and shouts of fear and mercy shrieked from inside the walls. I could hear the sounds of children, women, and men screaming, hollering, frightened for their lives. Stop Alexander...try to destroy him...but their prayers went unanswered, as finally I found the wall that gave in to our thrusts, our seige engines, and the navy that soon came to surround the city. We poured our way into the city, climbing walls, dropping into the city where inner fortresses had been built but were now afire from the missiles that had pelted them...smoke bellowed, my eyes stung, my nose was clogged, my lungs were heavy from breathing in the fire, the oil, the mist, but I plunged ahead, with my troops beside and behind me...we surrounded the city then, and made all the survivors our captives. We then paid our respect to the gods...which act alone proved that we had the gods on our side as we had known all along...Sacrifices were made, the villains were punished, and each man in the army was vindicated...we would not and could not be stopped or prevented from accomplishing what is our destiny and right to do. We are in control.
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